The first thing that may happen is a growing awareness that things were not right when you were a child.  A dark place in your heart begins to reveal snippets of uncomfortable feelings.

Pay attention.

Don't drink or drug to suppress them.  They are coming forward, asking to be revealed and begging to be healed.  It may be that you knew all along you were abused, brutalized, tortured and sexually used in one form or another.

Sometimes, it appears suddenly, as a giant shock!

Regardless, pay attention.  Your mind is telling you it is time to work it out.  The sooner you can work through this pain, the faster your life will get back on track.  As bad as it may be, it won't get better if you try to ignore the facts.  In fact, your life will spiral out of control until you face it.

Don't waste your youth drinking and drugging to mask the pain and bury the shame.  It won't go away, no matter how much you drink or use drugs.  All you will have left is the wasted years of your youth if your don't die early.

The best way to get through this is with a trusted person.  Charge ahead, examine what happened and speak OUT!  Seek to change laws regarding child abuse, brutality and torture.  Write a new law addressing your experiences to save another child.  Educate the public about the permanent damage of child physical and sexual assaults.

Don't be afraid and don't be shy.