Sunday, October 22, 2017
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Blame

First the child is set up with statments prior to sexual contact such as, "You are so sexy that I have no control over myself around you."  That sets the stage for blaming the child later on and transferring the responsibi8lity to keep quiet, keep secrets for the rest of the child's life.

  •  "No one believes a stupid kid."
  • "Keep our secret or you'll go to jail."
  • "It is against the law what we did so the state will put you in foster care."
  • "If you tell what happened, I'll be arrested and fired. It will be your fault."
  • "If I go to jail, you and your mom will starve."
  • "No one will love you if you tell."
  • "Your Mom will be really mad and throw you out of the house."
  • "How could you betray me like this?"
  • "Kids who make adults do this are always locked up."
  • "Your mom will kick you out of the house for making me do this."
  • "How would you mom feel about you if she knew what you had done?"
  • "When kids force adults to do this, they are put away."
  • "You made me do this."
  • "You have all the power over me and the police know."

 

This is a preplanned set up  for the child for to accept blame and therefore responsibility.  Once the child takes ownership, they will go to their grave protecting the secret.

Once the child accepts ownership of blame, the pedophile is free to find a new victim knowing the secret is safe.

Keeping secrets keep the child locked at the emotional age when the trauma took place.  This creates a "chi-ult" where the child can not mature into an adult.  Repeat offenders are an example of a chi-ult, repeatedly committing the same crime but somehow expecting the outcome to be different.

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